Little something.

I had a surprise visit from my aunt and cousin! Well, not really surprise cz i knew about it earlier and they were meant to surprise my family. It's nice tho :) Seeing your relatives. And we're going to have dim sum tmr awww.

Oh. I told you i plan to make a study timetable right? I made one. Heee. Not sure it will work, but im really pleased with it because at the very least, i can keep track of all the work im supposed to do, and most importantly, it lets me know HOW DIFFICULT IT IS TO FINISH ALL OF THEM IN TWO WEEKS. Not enough man. Luckily today i did some of my Psychology work, and i wanted to do my essay but.. it's already ten+ -__- I'm working ahead of my timetable anyway, minus how i didnt plan for unexpected "event" that might arise. I'll work my butt off in case of that, dont you worry. OF COURSE YOU'RE NOT WORRY. Oh i actually love organising my stuff so much, i cleaned my study table, vacuum three rooms, and organised my folder today. I need to be so organised, I cant even stand myself sometimes -.- Hahaha. A bit of OCD  i guess :P

Hmmm i feel sick :( what the hell is wrong with my digestive system man. Seriously. ugh.

Now, should i read my book or write my Psychology essay?

When everything goes in the right way :)))

Today has been great!

Well, to begin with i dont have extra hw from Film Studies (YAYY), no hw for Photography (there is actually, but we've got to do it in school :P), it didnt snow (pretty sunny in fact), the playlist in my phone randomly plays my fav songs in a sequence, and at the very least, nothing really went wrong today :)

I was feeling so optimistic today! But today they made us create a powerpoint presentation "explaining" the the Year 11 kids about the subjects we are doing. I had to do about Film Studies, cz my friend and i were the only ones in Year 12 who are taking FS. So yeah, it was alright, we managed to get it over and done with :)

I dont know what else to write, really.

Oh i do actually. haha. IT'S EASTER HOLIDAYS :)))) a two-week one. But im gonna indulge myself in my mountain of homework :) Plus law revision session next Tuesday YAY! :) So yeah. no homework for me. It's purely revision revision revision and homework homework and homework. It's not that bad really. I FEEL SO MOTIVATED THESE DAYS. just feel so. so optimistic and positive! a strong belief that everything is gonna be alright!

And today my friend says im an inspiring person ngawwww. Thanks, that really made my day <3 :3

Hmm what else. Oh i actually wanted to start my work today but i thought, nah. im gonna start tomorrow or saturday. Because i really need a break from everything @.@ im so so tired and sleepy. but the thing is, im so worried that if i leave my urge to get on with my work, im gonna lose the motivation tmr or the next day :( Im planning to draw up a study timetable and plan which work im gonna do everyday. Although i may not stick to it, at least i know which work i should get on with on that day. Dunno whether it's workable, but i'll try. And the thing is -___- my teacher says she has a copy of the timetable but i didnt realise that im gonna need it and so i didnt take it. WHAT THE. they gave us a copy last month during our parent evening but it's in my locker :( ah it's okay, i'll draw one myself :B no actually im gonna download from the internet -__- HAHA. and erm erm erm im gonna be reading for all night today :) it's been so so so long since i've read a book. that it errrrr last year in June or so. HOW SAD. oh and i wanted to go shopping/window shopping in the centre near my house. But i'll have to catch the bus. It's been long (again) since i've bought something to reward myself. Like, really buy something i love, using my own money. That might sound a bit daft, but God knows how hard i've worked since school's started.

Hmm, my bestie Ginny is going to NS this Saturday and gonna be back on the 21st June. im gonna miss her so much :( HEY YOU MUST TAKE CARE OKAY. have fun in Sabah :) I know you'll enjoy it! Hopefully. haha. when you come back we must talk about your experience there okay! Every single detail! haha. love you!

So yeah. I wanna start (it's continue actually. i've stopped reading it last year -.-) reading my book! It's a chick-flick book but oh well, any book will do. Alrighty ho, till then!

Mindmaps.

Hahaha.

So I started History today! It wasnt as bad as i thought :')

It was good. At least i see two familiar faces there ;) and we had good laughs at times. I went through the whole textbook and made brief mindmaps of each topic, and time passed so quickly. And I'll have to make other detailed mindmaps for the first 5 topics because Im gonna have a mock exam on this on Wednesday after the holiday. It's just to test what i know and how to improve. I dont know how im gonna answer it but.. i'll figure it out :) All in all, i kinda like it. I mean, it's stupid to think how Im NOT gonna be able to do it. I'm already here in this state where i just have to do whatever it takes to.. work in the things i should do. I dont even know what im on about hahaha. but my point is, LIFE GOES ON. it's time to work really really hard. Exams are around the corner!

Oh i just found out that my GCSE results suck. Look, i only have 5 subjects. Which included a B in English ... How am i gonna compete with the other students who have got straight A*s? Means, I'll have to make my Personal Statement really stand out and also my LNAT exam and err A levels. Which i doubt everything will be going right. But oh well that's life.

I realised that whenever im feeling optimistic, there's always some bad things that bring my mood down. EVERYTIME. contradictory -__-

I needa finish my FS work :( till then, BYE!

I really hate my tummy.

Last few days I have stomachache, today i have constipation. I know I'm not suppose to say this to the whole world, but im so pissed.

Okay, enough of my rantings.

IM SO EXCITED FOR TMR'S FIRST HISTORY LESSON. i really hope i'll like it. And get good grades (not really possible), i'll try my best. And if it's not working, i'll tell my teacher that i cant do it. As simple as that :)

OH AND IT'S LAST DAY OF SCHOOL BEFORE WE BREAK UP FOR EASTER THIS THURSDAY. awesomeeee. Sadly i wont have Friday law lesson. But it's alright, we're gonna have revision session the the 2nd April. Yay :) And i like holidays (DUH who doesnt) becauseeeeee. I need not to rush homework for the next lesson. i'm gonna have loads hw by this weekend, but it's gonna be a productive holiday :) hopefully. Haha.

And im planning my visit to the Crown & Mags court for this hol! Hope it will work :) Cant wait! Oh and my friend is going to the Bham Library this week. I'm thinking whether or not i should join her for her Eng lesson. Just to go to the library. Haha. I'll ask the teacher :)

Wish upon a star.

I always have tummy ache. Hate is such a big word but.. I hate my stomach. Ugh.

Im supposed to shower now, but decided to type something :D

I have a Psychology mock exam tmr and im not even revising. Goodness. Im lacking motivation man. I wonder if I'll do well in the mock. I used to have high marks because I cared so much that i revised real hard for mocks. And my sis was like, it's JUST a mock. with the -__- face. But recently i have too many things to think about i dont even have the time to get motivated and revise. Last couple of months, when i read the textbook, the things would go into my mind, eventually. But recently (again) the things dont really seem to stick in my brain. Im so scared. Suddenly feel so insecure.

BUT. my whole point of writing my blog is not saying how my brain becomes so rebellious. It's about how excited i am to learning a new subject!

I forgot whether ive told you this before, but erm. I'm gonna start History this Wednesday! :) Im supposed to start last Wednesday but I went to the trip. So. Last week my teacher told me that he wanted me to have a go in this summer exam for History. My first reaction was like O__O well before this (right after i took my results) he did tell me he wanted to let me take the new subjects right away. But he thought it's too late. And now he said why not just give it a go. Previously he asked me about my workload, and i said it's alright at the moment. I SHOULD'VE SAID it's rather heavy. Cz when he talked to me about taking History this month, he started off with "rmb when i asked you about your workload, you said it's alright", and now i'll have to take history cz he thinks that i'll get a good grade, although it might be a disappointing one. That means I'll have to sacrifice Elective (FITNESS T___T) to pick up History. He asked whether it's alright, i said, yeah it's okay, it's just electives. And he said oh, JUST electives, i'll tell Miss V (my fitness teacher) that. -_____________- pfft. hahaha.

I have mixed feeling about it actually. On one hand, it's really great that i have the chance to do it, and im really excited to learn History (dunno why). MY FRIENDS ARE EVEN MORE EXCITED hahaha. one of them was showing me her folder awww, and another will be there during the lesson :) On the other hand, what if i cant do it? Will I be able to cope? As in, what about my other subjects? the homework? I really need to get good grades in my other two subjects. I'm afraid that i might neglect the other subjects. And one more thing. What if i get bad grade in this History exam? Means i'll have to retake it next year. So.. what's the point of it?

But but but. I talked to my Psychology teacher during the trip ( i sat next to her lol) and she said, just give it a try for a few lessons, see how it goes and whether im able to catch up. I needa catch up on one whole unit it 2 months. That is 8+ lessons. Omg how am i gonna do this. So yeah. I'll see how it goes :) NEVERTHELESS IM SO EXCITED FOR WEDNESDAY! i hope i'll like it and am able to pick up quickly. Fingers crossed!

Oh and about my psychology trip, there were 4 lectures. 2 of them were really interesting :) and we got to meet Elizabeth Loftus! and learn about serial killers. Not bad not bad. The only thing is, THE JOURNEY WAS SO LONG. and i felt so sick on the way back.

You know what, at first when i started this post, my idea was to write "IM SO EXCITED TO LEARN HISTORY!" and end it. Dunno why passive things such as my dilemma popping up. AND. i really need to study for my mock tmr. Oh Lord help me :(

Cold!

It's snowing. Again. Like what the hell? In the end of March -.- And apparently it's gonna snow again tmr and next week. Oh please. Let some sun shine through the day T___T

Oh today I had my interview for the internship. I was pretty nervous right before the interview in the afternoon, but not so in the morning. Mainly because i had so much work to do, i didnt even have the time to be nervous. Ended up the homework wasnt checked by my teacher. But oh well at least i've done it.

I had my interview in the afternoon when i had my law class. So when i asked my teacher to leave the classroom, he's like, "okay. good luck. the whole class will be praying for you." hahaha awww. and my friends were lick GOOD LUCK ASHLEIGH! very heartwarming :) Okay so when i reached the metting room, i had to wait for nearly 30 minutes .__. because another applicant was STILL in there. for more than 30 mins. i was like, is there so much to talk about o.o and they were laughing so happily and like good old friends meeting up together. That made my interview sounds so crappy ._. but oh well it's over. So they asked me to describe myself, and i went O_O WHO AM I (nah not really), i talked about my subjects etc. they also asked me what animal i want to be, and i said panda ._. sho cute. But they said panda is so lazy and just sit there and chew on bamboo. HAHAHA. so i said squirrel? and the interviewer said YES squirrel. such an energetic animal, isnt it! (with that happy voice) and always looking for opportunities. I was like, *laughs* yeah ... ._. and then they asked more random questions like, what book i'd bring to a desert. I couldnt think of any so i just blurted out Harry Potter -.- which i wont say i love the whole series much, but it's still alright. And what song i like. That afternoon in law lesson, my friend was singing Taylor Swift's Love Story loudly and that stuck in my head so yeah, i said that in the interview. Which is pretty funny. And they actually typed everything i said in the computer. GREAT.

It was a 30-min chat really. Not really a formal interview. nonetheless i feel so happy i wasnt extremely nervous about it. Cz i got told that im gonna have this interview on Monday. I was like, oh right. Okay.

:D

And today i even helped out in the counter in my parents' shop receiving orders.

I guess it's time to grow up, really.

Confidence.

I've wanted to talk about this since ages ago. But didnt have the opportunity. Haha. Um, actually I'm still having dizziness but I have time so it's okay.

I found out that Im a much more confident person since i've come here, and study in my new school. I still remember the times in Malaysia, where I dont even have the courage to ask teacher something. It's something I've learned here. Somehow the environment has changed me quite much. I feel it's a really really good thing. At least i feel less useless. haha. Erm, I think it's because of the teachers and education here, where they praise you for every tiny little thing you do. I feel that is really encouraging, well not in exceptional situations of course. It's like, when you do well, you'll get compliments, and if you dont, the teachers will advise you to try harder and there's always a chance where you can improve. compared to the edu system in malaysia where among the motivating things a teacher says in school, the common ones are "teruskan usaha anda" which means "keep it up", and "tingkatkan prestasi anda" which basically means "try harder" (and mind you, these phrases appear in almost every single student's report), the system in here is more analytic, where the teachers write comments about a student's progress once in a few months (they call it "pragress phase 1/2/3 etc.). I mean, it's not that it's not good, and i understand that the teachers have much more important things to do other than commenting on our progress in school, but it's quite crucial that the students know what they're doing well in school and what arent.

Okay. topic drifted, my apologies.

Erm, back to "confidence", I found out that I am willing to stand in front of the class and talk :D THAT'S SUCH A MASSIVE IMPROVEMENT FOR ME. and i remembered on last friday, my friends wanted to ask a teacher something, but she's got a lesson in her class and so my friend asked me to help her to ask the teacher (complicated, i know). And i actually didnt mind that :) I mean, looking back, i think i would be saying things like "WE GO TOGETHER", or "NO WAY, YOU GO" all these sort of stuff.

And a few weeks ago, we had to present to a class about Cyber Bullying. Everyone was quite reluctant to do it, cz we didnt really prepared and just planned to read from the text. My friend (SHE'S GOT STRAIGHT A* IN GCSE OMG) and I were like, shall we just do it then? and we we kind of took the lead and presented to the class. And i was quite confident :D

I think it's partly because of my Film Studies lesson. Cz every fortnight we had to "discuss" within outselves about a particular topic we've chosen to do. So it kinda trained me to speak and discuss publicly about a topic. And there's partly where my confidence comes from :D

I'm glad that i have these sort of changes, really. Nowadays i feel presenting something is not really scary and with enough preparation, i should do quite well :) And it boosts my confidence when i know i did well in it! :D

Honestly, I like the education system here. It's less hectic than in Malaysia. I know studying in Malaysia is really tough. And you've just got to do exceptionally well in order to stand out from the crowd. i was used to the position where everyone did so well compared to me, and i was just one of them who didnt work hard to strive, one of the hundreds of thousands who thought that it's pretty pointless to try, but fail, to succeed. BUT. I've woken up! Instead, i wanna be the one who CAN do well and make my parents, teachers and friends really really proud.

WATCH ME DO IT!

Choice.

I should really be doing my homework now but, i just cant be bothered at the moment. Im feeling a bit dizzy now, probably cz i slept at 2am yesterday and woke up at 10.30am today. It's not about how long i slept, it's how late. I always feel dizzy whenever i sleep late. Plus i dont have much homework, although the law booklet needs a bit hardwork. oh well i'll do it tmr if not tonight. Good thing about the new topics is that we have more time to do our work!

So. Look at the picture below.

I got it from my school website. haha. And yes, Im gonna go on and on about my subject choices again. So please feel free to leave if you cant stand this.

I realised some time ago that we're meant to, well not really meant to but supposed to, choose from the same category. So tell me, why on earth did I choose Law, Psychology (YELLOW [my fav colour] :D) and then Film Studies and Photography (orange) ? -___- Okay there's no point ranting now, but i just wanna imply that LOOK. if i choose History (definitely) and Geog/EngLit, EVERYTHING IS GONNA BE IN THE SAME COLOUR. HAHAHA. it feels perfect now. I should've looked at those pretty colours in the first place. No actually, WHY DIDNT THE SCHOOL SHOW ME WHEN I WAS CHOOSING THE SUBJECT. *shoving off the responsibilities :P* Yeah. Everything is gonna be alright!

And I looked at the past exam papers of Eng Lit and Geog. Eng Lit was of bigger sets of questions, like having one question which consists of 21 marks, and you have to answer about 4 questions i think (forgot -.-). But Geography consists of small and big questions, just like in Psychology. There are 2-, 4-, 6- to 10- or 15-mark questions. I thought i'd do better in small questions. But having looked at my current exam results, i've obviously done better in large questions (Law) than small questions (Psychology). Things always arent what i thought/expect. So I really dont know how to measure :(

By looking at the questions, although im still in dilemma, i think I'd be more interested in Geog. There are indeed loads of stuff and key terms i have to rmb, but for Eng Lit, i'll have to analyse the whole text, for example, how are men being victims in the text etc. I feel that the questions are quite daunting to me. Considering that i'm not really keen in analysing, or rather dissecting, stuff, I might really choose Geography. But my school website says that i need GCSE geog to do A lvl. I'll double check with my teacher and see. I feel like talking to my FS teacher, but my instinct tells me that i might not enjoy EngLit, since i dont really enjoy analysing films, which is kind of similar to English.

My dizziness is getting more serious. I needa go now, bye!

Oh and I'll update you on Tuesday after I've told my teacher about the subjects. Bye :)

BTW GOOD LUCK AND ALL THE BEST TO THOSE WHO ARE GONNA TAKE THEIR SPM RESULTS! <3

I'm suddenly very looking forward to learning the new subjects/the subjects I'm gonna study next year. Say, history definitely. And I think i might be interested in geography more than eng lit. I don't think I'm the kind of person who like analysing things in-depth. But sigh. My opinion changed from time to time. Last few days I was pretty clear that I should take Englit. But then now I feel like taking Geog T_T

But no matter what subject it is, it'll be fun to learn new things! I have no idea why I'm having such positive thoughts haha.

Misery.

I know I shouldnt look back but i just wanted to note down a few things that made my day miserable.

Erm firstly, I had tummy ache and felt so tired during the whole day.

Then during Law lesson, we had mock and i havent really done well cz i revised for the mock but everything didnt seem to go into my stupid brain. Plus i really dont like the topic :( actually, now im alright with it. cz i revised :D

Thirdly, after the mock we started a new topic, and i actually couldnt wait and was excited to learn about it. well it turned out that this was even worse than the previous one. it's not the topic, it's our hw booklet. it's quite confusing :(

Oh and we were told that we would have our exam marks break-down, to know our marks in each question we did in exam. but teacher was too busy and we didnt get to know it :(

then at home, i had to do so many things. ugh it's just too tiring.

sometimes i just dont wanna care about anything. it's just too much effort.

It's been a week!

Erm, one more day actually. But why does it seem like it's been ages since i've updated my blog? Well, i guess this week has been a really long week.

Oh. I havent told you this yet. Erm. I've talked to my teacher to sort out my subjects, and he said I should take History, AND EngLit/Geography/Business. Damn it man, why do i always have to decide? I cant decide T__T my another BIG weakness: indecisiveness. I asked around for opinion, but no one really paid attention to my problem -.- I understand actually, cz they have their own problems too. Today after school i saw Mrs C the head of Post16 and i've spoken to her. like everyone said, she advised me to choose Eng Lit. But the thing is im worried that i wont like it, analysing texts and stuff. So i told her im worried that if i've chosen a subject i dont like, i might not do well in it and get a bad grade. YOU KNOW WHAT SHE SAID TO ME. she said, from what she's heard from both my Law and Psychology teachers, im not the kind of student who will get bad grades in any subjects :')))) THAT'S VERY MOTIVATING. hahaha. it's always nice to hear those things from teachers isnt it. Well dont worry, im not getting overboard or anything, just that i feel so encouraged for a second or too. haha. I'll ask my friend who does Geography AND Eng Lit and see what she says. And my teacher advises me to look for the head of Geography to get some information about the subject. So. GEOGRAPHY OR ENGLIT? I heard Eng Lit is so difficult T_T the highest result they'd got this year is C :S I might talk to my Film Studies teacher (who teaches EngLit) too actually. I'll see how it goes :) actually, no smiley face. this matter is quite stressful for me.

Oh. today i went to Aston University for a Law in a Business Context masterclass. It was great! I thoroughly enjoyed the whole session. We learned about Fraud and Employment Policy. I was engaged with the activity and found out that i really love Law! :D I love finding out the tiny bits of details and justifying the facts. It gives me a sense of achievement dunno why. Haha. For example today, we had to analyse whether the employees had committed fraud and/or breached the policy, and we had to analyse the email to find out some facts, i notice the dates (the employee took one month to reply the email from the boss HAHA) had gone wrong. And it was only our group who has discovered it :D Oh btw we didnt have lunch because of the masterclass. HAHAAH topic drifted. but oh well. it was a good afternoon.

Not evening though -.- I stayed after school to finish off my work. BUT MY PLAN FAILED. i have no idea how i manage to use 1+hours doing nothing in school. I actually laid all my work out on the table, but time just passed and i've got no work done. WHY. And the sky was getting dark so i was being paranoid and quickly gone home. THE BUS TOOK SO LONG TO ARRIVE. i was getting even more paranoid but grateful and thank God i reached home safely. Although i didnt get my work done, I DID realise that when i was halfway looking at my FS work DUE TMR, i noticed i've done it wrong. so i managed to correct it. FUH. if not it will be so embarrassing when i present it to the class tmr -.- oh and like i said i managed to talk to the head of post16 and it was a nice talk, talking to someone who can actually advise you on something you have no idea about. Although it was a short talk, it's worthy to discover that OMG IM SO CONCERNED WITH MY FUTURE. ahahaha. seriously.

Okay then i shall call it a day!

AND I FINISHED MY FS WORK NGEGEHEHEHEHE i hate wednesdays man, always so busy.
KAY BYE.

Flying colours.

Today was results day! It was a really long day. We reached school at 8.45am, then waited in the hall from 9am. The suspense was really killing me. Really. The teacher went through what we would receive on the day and also the grade boundaries. So at 10.20am (thank God it was earlier, they told us to expect results at 10.25am [i just realised it's just 5 mins earlier -.-]) and we went to the canteen next door and collect our results. before that my Law teacher came to my friends who were sitting in front of me and said "four of you will get A-C," and they went WOOHHHOOOHOOHOOHOO. "One A, one B and two C's". and even more WOOHOHOHOHO. i was sitting at the back like, what about me T____T so they asked us to bring our envelope which contained our results and open it in the Portakabin. You know, I COULDNT EVEN WAIT ANYMORE so i opened it and stole a look at it.. AND.. TADAAA.

A for Law, A for Psychology!

I was over the moon!

At first I looked at the "level" column and my heart literally skipped a beat. Thank God i recovered from that mini heart attack when i opened my eyes wider. 116/120 for Law!!! 90/100 for Psychology!!!

The feeling I was having wasnt counted as happy, but dont get me wrong. I AM happy, but not at that moment. It's more like a relief? BIG relief Yet sliiiiight disappointment. It's a mixed feeling really. Not to brag about my results, but that's just how I feel. I was, still am, really overwhelmed by the results. At one very moment I felt like crying. But of course I didnt. I cant believe it's 4 marks to full marks! This is higher than I expected, cz i thought HONESTLY i was gonna get 100-110. It was quite a tough paper. And once in a while I actually kept counting before I sleep how many marks I would give if I was to mark my own paper. and as harshly as i could be, I gave myself 109. FOUR MARKS TO FULL MARKS MAN. In fact my teacher said he's surprised that i didnt get 100% on this. How nice. haha. I didnt dare to put too high expectations for Law tho. Scared that I might fall even harder if I didnt get the results I wanted.

So after I opened my results, my friends came and told me that they "guessed" I'm 4 marks to full marks. I was like O___O HOW DID U KNOW? they were like "we guessed." but in the end they told me my law teacher was telling the other law teachers about it and one of my friends heard it. remember i told you the teachers knew the results yesterday? and they were like so depressed. haha. but i think most of them are happy. cz we were told that our year has achieved the best January exam results. YAY!

Oh and two of my friends in my law class and another from the other class got A too! I'm so proud of them :) they worked really hard in this! And our law teachers are pretty pleased with our results ;) i heard that there was a student a few years ago who got full marks for this exam @.@ incredible man. Haha. So yeah.

And about Psychology, i actually expected to be more than 95. But 90 is still really good to me :) In fact I'm the only one who's got an A :)

I'm really proud of myself!

So in the evening we had parents evening. And look at what my teachers commented about me!

Top to bottom: Film Studies, Law, Photography, Psychology.

Besides results, that made my day, really. I'm the kind of person who cares quite much about what others think about me. Guess that's my little weakness. But i feel that's the only way to improve, to make sure what is better for me. AND LOOK AT THE LAW COMMENT. A* MAN, A*. how can i not be overwhelmed? AND THAT INCLUDES A2 WHICH IS NEXT YEAR.

So i talked to my teacher one by one. Firstly I talked to my photography teacher because no one was there. We took a couple minutes, talking about preparing for my controlled assessment in 26th April.

Then my Film Studies teachers, one who I've just seen in lesson 2 hours before HAHAHA, and she said she didnt really know what else to say, cz we basically talk about everything in lesson. Rmb i told you we only have 4 students in lesson? So yeah. And erm she said if possible she wanted to push me to Grade A (my predicted grade is B) since I've got an A in both Psychology and Law. then my another FS teacher said the similar thing, and also because I've done GCSE Film Studies and got an A*, it's possible to push it further.

And my Psychology teacher, she said she's so proud of me! :') and im the only one who's got an A in the whole year 12. Honestly i think AQA the exam board made the grade boundaries higher. So many people got bad results in AQA board's exam! Like Eng Lit and stuff. So yeah. And she asked me whether Im continuing it next year and i said "definitely!". She said if i dont say "definitely" she's gonna make me do it anyway. Hahah.

Then Law. Fuh SUCH A LONG QUEUE. Yeah I talked to my teacher and it only took me a few minutes o.o other people took so long. So he said he's really proud of me and now I have to focus on getting an A* next year! He asked me how i find the new unit, and i was like, the previous unit is so much more straightforward. He agreed and said that's the worrying part. Cz the school used to do the second unit first and then the first unit. So when this year's people get good grades, they're gonna think "oh I got good results already anyway so Unit 2 shouldnt be a problem." and dont revise hard for it. some of them in my class did in fact say that this unit is so easy. And i would never describe any subject as "easy". I was like, why is every one saying easy but im kinda struggling @.@ Oh and he said make sure i remind him to talk about sorting out my subjects. Seems like staying in school for another isnt an option for me anymore :P I dont mind really :)

So that's basically it! Im so proud of everyone I know and myself today :) Everyone was happy although some of them may resit the exams again.

Last but not least, I'd like to thank you people ( ;) ) from Msia who wished me luck! Thanks so much :) I feel so loved. haha.

I've been typing this for more than half an hour. Gotta sleep now, BYE!

Tomorrow is a gift.

HELLO :) i wanted to update my blog so badly ytd, because it was such a good day :)

Yesterday was so warm, even looking outside made me feel happy because of the sun. SUNSHINE MAKES ME HAPPY. really. how ironic, it's totally the opposite in Msia. But oh well. So yeah, i changed my coat and lucky me, i remembered to take my key fob and locker key :D and also my phone. It just came to me that i forgot to take those things. And I love Tuesdays because I have Law and Psychology only :) My two favourite subjects. During free time, i made my own Caramel Latte which i brought to school from home. Tiny little things make me happy :) During Law lesson, i felt so relaxed! like, not so stressed. Cz it was another teacher teaching us. She's nice :) it's good to have her once in a while. We didnt *ahem* do too much in that lesson, just going through something we learned in the past lessons and answering some questions together. It's less stressful, and in fact a very relaxing lesson, partly cz she doesnt question us individually. When a teacher questions the students individually every lesson, you know you have to be prepared. PLUS. WE HAVE NO HOMEWORK FOR THAT LESSON. HOW AWESOME. usually we have so many pages to do. :') i was chilling these few days. and didnt have to stay back today to finish my work. you know, i cant work at home :P so yeah. OH. and i went out shopping with my mom. and bro. bought a new coat :D furry coat <3 i've always wanted to buy a coat. But cant find any. And it's so cheap :') £15. im gonna take a picture of it tmr cz im gonna wear it for the first time during my results day. Hope it'll bring me luck! Since the title for March Photoaday for tmr is "Something You Wore", im gonna upload it on instagram as well :D what a coincidence <3 that's basically the good things that'd happened ytd. It's not much. But as i said, tiny little things make me happy :)

SO. talking about today. I had this end of unit test for Psychology, and it was alright :) a bit more difficult than the past unit tho. But i think i should be fine :) AND THE RESULTS ARE IN THE SCHOOL SINCE THIS MORNING. IT'S LIKE SO NEAR YET SO FAR. it's there, but we could never reach it today. the teachers knew the results already, and my friends were like, LOOK AT THEIR FACE EXPRESSION AND MOOD. then they went to see my Psychology teacher and she went "sorry girls, i cant tell you yet," with her normal face. The funniest thing i've heard was their business teacher who has that poker face all the time when they asked her things and replied with that monotone voice. ahahahaah.

then i had this Law teacher from another class, she said "Good luck girls :)" and THAT MADE ME EVEN MORE NERVOUS. and i saw my Law teacher, he looked normal, a bit stressed i would say. which made me even even more nervous. everyone looked a bit depressed. and freaked out. haha. including the students i mean. okay im really nervous now.

And thanks people who wished me luck :) i really need that. i hope tmr is the best day of the year :) idk whether i'll be emotional and shed a tear of joy tho. IM SO SCARED. we have to be in the hall and 9am, have some kind of assembly till 10.35am and have our results. omg suspense is killing me.

i suddenly thought of this getting-results feeling. to me getting results marks the end of school year and that's when we achieve what we want to achieve throughout the whole year with hardwork and determination. opening the results sleeve is like putting a stop in what we've learned in the past. It's a mixed feeling, really. Part of me actually want to keep this hope and expectation but another major part of me wants to take the result so badly. You get what i mean? but actually i wanna take my results more than not knowing it. hahaha. it's just the tiny part of me which keeps thinking too much. especially when i have loads of Film Studies (never-ending) work to do.

Oh on Monday, my Film Studies teacher was so funny! Well her class is always fun and funny but it's just too much work :( oh anyways, she said "oh girls i've read your essays. i enjoyed reading them! ... but then i read mine again." HAHAHAHAHA. you get what it means? you know, when we were writing essays in lesson, we were at page 2 squeezing our brain for more ideas whilst she's on the 6th page. SIXTH. we were like, omg our essays will sound so crappy after we've read Miss's hahaha.

IM SO SCARED. today during fitness electives time i was still thinking about the results although i was so exhausted working out for 1+ hours. i really dont wanna disappoint my teachers and mom. i wanna show them i can strive it. I actually thought working out would occupy my mind for a sec, because i'd have to listen to my teacher's instructions for the steps, but it didnt really turn out that way. i think im thinking and stressing myself too much. but oh well. that's where my motivation come from :)

No matter what results im gonna get, im gonna work harder and put myself in the best position i can be :)

wish me luck! i'll update you as soon as i possibly can :)